Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Dignity Lost In The Sheets

Hi, bubbles inside my head. You are upsetting me! Crank, crank, crank, bubble, bubble... I am trying to think clearly and you keep bubbling up and bursting at the targets of my thoughts. YOU ARE ANNOYING! STOP IT! Ok, I am going to stop resisting you and just relax and let your bubble waves put me to sleep.  Ahhh, that's better, I am so tired. Just need some peaceful, restful sleep.  "MR. WALTERS, I AM CANDY. I AM YOUR NURSE ON CALL TONIGHT." B#%%^,!!!!! I am trying to sleep! Sorry Mom, I know I agreed to not use profanity in your blessed memory. But it's ingrained in me. Remember when I was in kindergarten and the kids taught me how to sing Yankee Doodle Dandy with all F's? I had no idea what it meant, but got in big trouble when I sang it, in front of you and Daddy in the doctor's office. Remember that? "If you need anything the call button is right here attached to your bed. If you have to urinate, use that," she pointed to the table. "I'll be back later with your meds." Well, I did have to urinate. The problem was I was too weak and exhausted to reach the table for the 'bathroom surrogate.' I was able to hit the call button. But, by the time Candy came in, the pool of warm liquid had saturated my sheets. I started to laugh and cry at the same. I just peed my bed like a 2 year old. Two female attendance came in. They unhooked all of my attachments. They rolled me over exposing all of my private parts and skillfully changed my sheets. I just lost my dignity. I'm too weak and tired to feel embarrassed. Just want to go back to sleep and enjoy the bubbles in my head.

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